Conscious Choice Seattle: Eco-Makeover

November 2005 | Feature Story

Eco-Makeover

Unsure about mid-life? An adventure trek surprise, can clear up a woman’s outlook.

By Heather Nordell

“What will I do now?

How do I let go of old baggage?

How do I make more meaning in my life?

What is my authentic self and voice?”

Imagine eight strangers from three countries musing these questions from the rim of a vast caldera. They are looking at so much open space—in both their immediate view and during mid-life.

Together, these 40- and 50-something women traverse the sublime landscape of the Banks Peninsula in New Zealand. They backpack for five long days migrating from hut to hut.

Their own physical strength and emotional tenacity surprises many of the women. For six days, they travel in pairs, a different hiking partner each day. At night, they form an intimate circle, tell stories and give witness to one another, creating space to rediscover their authentic voices. As it turns out, this seemingly unlikely band of mid-life women is not really unlikely at all.

Jenn Wright, 52, and Chris Rummer, 55, created their eco-adventure and coaching company, Mid-Life Heroines, to give women in transition (from work, family roles, relationship endings) an experience through which they can become the heroine in their own life stories.

Consider their work as an eco-makeover for mid-life. But without any of the reality show drama and hype.

“Mid-life is more of a state of mind than an age,” says Rummer. “Through much of adulthood, women often find themselves living for others—through their jobs, kids and spouse.”

This mid-life juncture comes with familiar questions that Rummer and Wright hear every week from clients: “What about me?” they are asked. Or “If not now, then when?” is another query.

Wright contributes answers and guidance from her home base in New Zealand. Rummer completes the inspirational connection here in Seattle. Both women believe in the confidence boost that we can draw from nature and eco-adventure.

Rummer explains: The dramatic change in physical place gives the women a chance to change their perspectives. They get out of the ordinary and the routine. They soak up the vistas and inhale the fresh air. New friendships develop. Guards are let down. Old hurts are introduced and processed.

Soon enough, the women become more open to “claiming their gifts.” Rummer and Wright talk about letting go of emotional baggage.There can be a lot of it.

Personal roots

Mid-Life Heroines was born from personal experience. When Jenn Wright was 47, she lived the American Dream. She worked as an occupational therapist, life coach and teacher of health, well being, and aging at a university.

Wright’s work gave her an acute awareness of the aging process and knowledge that there are no guarantees in life. The right house, car and retirement plans were not going to prevent her from aging or give her life meaning. She realized she needed to rediscover herself.

In response, Wright and her college-age son decided to travel to New Zealand for a first-time backpacking trip. They spent five days in the wilderness. During that time, Wright challenged herself both physically and emotionally. She grappled with questions around overcoming fear and realized the profound power of adventure therapy.

Not long after they returned, Wright made a decision. She up and moved to New Zealand. Simple—and as complicated as that.

Subsequently, Wright learned about a coaching teleconference led by Rummer, who is a Ph.D. developmental psychologist. Chris’s unique experience gave her an idea. She emailed Rummer to propose that the two of them combine their skills to lead what became Mid-Life Heroine adventures together. The first trip launched in New Zealand earlier this year.

Chris Rummer’s personal journey, too, blazed her trail to Mid-Life Heroines. Along with her private practice, she had done extensive work in cross-cultural change and led rites of passage workshops for teenage girls using expressive and visual arts. Similar to the work she now does for Mid-Life Heroines, Rummer saw a need to help girls reclaim their inner power and open their minds to their magical places, which had been shut down along the journey of growing up.

Rummer explains she works with women “out of her own story.”

“We teach that which we need to know,” says Rummer. “I started off as the most unlikely heroine.”

In early childhood Rummer’s mother told her that she was timid and she saw herself through that lens for most of her early life

“I needed to learn a different version of myself,” recalls Rummer.

Creating a new self

It took time, but Rummer began to create a new view of herself through using expressive arts such as painting and drawing as a vehicle to spark the imagination. Plus, Rummer traveled the world with her husband. During their trips, her husband worked most the day, and Rummer found herself exploring numerous countries on her own. She wrote a new chapter of self-confidence in her travelogue.

“I learned I could be anywhere in the world and feel comfortable,” says Rummer, who had moved to England with her husband.

Traveling opened her sense of adventure. She also felt validated by her husband who never saw her as a timid person. After a 30-year marriage, her husband was diagnosed and swiftly died of cancer in 2001. Rummer had to discover new ways to renew her strength.

Wright and Rummer have already led trips in New Zealand and at Mt. Hood. The eco-adventures combine self-reflection, art therapy, adventure therapy, group process, story telling and coaching. The five- to seven-day excursions include hiking, journaling, sharing, creative expression and symbolic rituals.

Each participant creates a Soul Collage, which is a montage of images that tells the “new story of the life” the woman wants to live.

The adventures often unearth some common issues that mid-life women experience. Many of the participants explore concerns about body and beauty image. Together, they explore what beauty is and how to begin to claim one’s beauty as a mature woman.

“In mid-life, women are made to feel invisible and disempowered,” Rummer says, “In reality, they are at the height of their own power. Being in nature brings us to a natural state where we drop away our masks and discover our authentic selves and true meanings of beauty.”

Betty Crockerism

Wright many American women grew up with “the Betty Crocker image” as a role model.

and later the Feminist movement “encouraged us to act more like our fathers.”

“These models left many women with unreachable expectations of themselves.” Wright says. She said trip participants need to learn about tools for self-care and how to accept support. That Betty Crocker-Feminist conundrum has blocked self-care, maybe for decades or an entire lifetime.

Participants explain the eco-makeover approach is working.

“I learned that I was strong and could do much more than I realized,” says Suzanne Holman, 57.

The 57-year-old Holman says she was excited to learn about Mid-Life Heroines.

“Then, after signing up, I began to panic,” she says.

Holman, who retired early after 25 years in education, had never backpacked nor flown internationally. The anticipation of the experience created immense anxiety. She began her heroine process before even leaving on the trip to New Zealand. She broke the process down in manageable steps (Rummer and Wright use a 10-step process) and coached herself through her fear.

What’s more, Holman trained hard to prepare for the physical demands of backpacking and worked through the mental, emotional and spiritual expectations of the trip.

When Holman arrived in New Zealand, she admits the physical demands of the journey were even more than she was expecting.

“But, I did it!” she recalls. “I didn’t realize how much that experience would change my attitude.”

Now, Holman doesn’t let her fear block her. Since her Mid-Life Heroine adventure, she has traveled to China. Plus, she started her own life coaching program (check out www. suzanneholman.com).

Holman uses backpacking as a metaphor for her life.

“The journey will be harder the more baggage I take with me,” she says.

Suzanne has had to draw on the recent strength she developed. Her two twin girls both had babies this year—one who is healthy and one who has CHARGE Syndrome, which involves serious defects and conditions related to the eyes, ears, heart and more.

“For two months, we didn’t know if [her grandson] was going to live,” says Holman. “This emotional challenge is deeper than I ever thought…Life is like a roller coaster. I now cherish the highs and realize when things go down, I know they will go back up again. You have to be with where you are.”

Letting go of the past

Katy Tyree. 57, describes similar growth. She returned from a Mid-Life Heroine adventure at Mt. Hood in early October. She too had great fear and anxiety about the physical challenge of the trip.

“I knew I had great tenacity, but didn’t know if I had the stamina to do all three of the hikes. Accomplishing that was incredibly rewarding,” she says.

Tyree particularly valued the hour of counseling provided by Chris Rummer prior to starting the journey, the Soul Collage exercise and the strong bonding that formed within the group.

“It is a powerful message to all women to come to points throughout life and learn to let go of the past and things that don’t give you life,” says Tyree.

One step Tyree has since taken is admitting her 28-year-old son into a drug and alcohol rehabilitation program. The son had already suffered physical traumas from his addictions and was in two separate car accidents while she was on her Mid-Life Heroine eco-adventure at Mt. Hood.

“When women step up and become heroines, the world becomes a better place,” says Wright. “These adventures help make that happen. I believe this is my gift.”

Wright and Rummer want to extend the eco-adventure and form a Mid-Life Heroine movement including Heroine clubs.

“We can reach out to support each other,” says Wright.

For her part, Rummer adds she believes the planet needs the wisdom of women after their childbearing years.

“My most cherished moments are when I watch someone blossom into what they were meant to be,” says Rummer, eyes rimming with tears. “I have seen the face of God in the face of the other person whose inner beauty shows. Every woman needs to know that she has what it takes to be a heroine.”

Heather Nordell is a writer and columnist for Evergreen Monthly.

For more information, visit www.midlifeheroine.com .

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