Conscious Choice Seattle: Dog Days of Summer

August 2004 | Dr. Cat

Dog Days of Summer

A reluctant feline surrenders to the call of canine charms

by Dr. Cat Saunders

With a first name like mine, you can imagine that dogs are generally not my favorite animals. I try to keep my prejudice to myself, however, because it’s politically incorrect to be an animal bigot. My only defense in being prejudiced against dogs is that I truly love wolves, which are, admittedly, canines. Perhaps there is hope for me yet. — Cat Saunders (The New Times, September 1994)

With those words, I began an article called “I Love John Because He Treats Me Like a Dog” (see www.drcat.org/articles_interviews/html/lovejohn.html). That tongue-in-cheek piece was written as a seventh-anniversary surprise for my longtime partner, John Giovine, who loves dogs. Now, ten years later in 2004, I decided it’s time to write another dog story for John to honor our 17th anniversary this August.

Many things have changed for me in the last ten years, but cats are still my favorite animals, and I still wouldn’t call myself a dog lover. Even so, I can honestly say that I genuinely love some dogs now, and the numbers are gradually increasing to include dogs I don’t even know. There are many dogs who capture my heart from afar when I see them running joyously alongside a jogger, flying through the air to catch a Frisbee, or panting patiently outside a store while awaiting the return of their human companions.

More importantly, I finally understand why John truly needs a dog in order to be completely happy. What’s more — and I can’t believe I’m saying this — I would like to have a dog with John. Boy, does that sound like a headline out of a tabloid: Cat has dog with man!

Seriously, though, after 17 years with me, you can bet that John’s had plenty of time to work on my dog prejudice, and I’ve had plenty of time to resist. After all, it’s highly unlikely that I will ever actually like the smell of dogs, or that I’ll ever actually enjoy certain canine qualities that would push the limits of any self-respecting feline (all you dog lovers out there, please refrain from throwing biscuits). It’s also highly unlikely that I would ever want to live with a dog if it weren’t for John.

Even so, love does strange things, and I love John like I’ve never loved before. Over time, I’ve come to realize that “the dog issue” was just another power struggle, albeit a relatively playful one. In that context, it felt scary for me not to resist having a dog, because I was afraid that if I didn’t resist, a dog would arrive on our doorstep whether I wanted one or not.

For me, my resistance is not only about dogs, but also about the addition of another bundle of energy to our household. I’m childless by choice, having known since I was 14 that I wouldn’t be a parent this time around. In the animal department, I’ve dearly loved the cats I’ve lived with in the past, especially my childhood cat who lived to be 18. Since I’ve been with John, however, I like to visit all the neighborhood cats and dogs with him, but I treasure living just with him. I often joke that he’s all the animal I need!

Aside from my personal preferences, I take the presence of animal companions seriously. I think it’s important for everyone in a home to truly want any animals that might live there. I strongly believe that animals deserve to be sincerely loved and welcomed, not merely tolerated (the same thing applies to humans, of course).

On the flip side of my resistance to dogs, I must confess that I’ve been dreaming about an amazing German shepherd for many years. The dog is beautiful and smart, and it loves me like crazy. The truth is, German shepherds are one breed I’ve always loved without having to work at it. Luckily for me, German shepherds are also at the top of John’s list of favorite dogs.

In my dreams about the German shepherd, I adore the dog and feel totally safe with it. We romp and cuddle and it serves as my loyal protector. Busted! Well, I do admit that I’ve long had a secret suspicion that a dog — perhaps a dog like the one in my dream — will eventually show up to live with John and me.

Once that happens, I hope I don’t become an insufferable dog fanatic who whips out photos of our pooch’s latest antics, the way some parents pull out precious photos of their babies and bore all but the most solicitous of friends. If I ever neglect my feline manners and forget to consider the needs of those who don’t love dogs, you have my permission to hang me from the nearest hydrant.

We all know what will happen to me there!

Cat Saunders, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist and the author of Dr. Cat’s Helping Handbook. To contact Cat or learn more about her work, please call (206) 329-0125 or visit www.drcat.org.

Catch Cat

Join Cat at Seattle’s Discover U (www.discoveru.org/206-365-0400) on Saturday afternoon, October 23, for her class: The Five-Minute Switch System “Making Addiction Work for you.”

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